It now feels like we’ve known one another forever, A and I. In our separate households we entertain each other – he comes to mine when the children are off his hands and I go to his when I have a spare overnight. In between we message and play app games or we might even arrange a date.
The familiarity though, has thrown up a less than savoury characteristic in myself; I completely forgot his birthday last month. To be fair, we were on holiday together and differences in time zones and getting over jet lag etc may have been the reason. However, the fact that even in the preparations for the holiday beforehand, I’d not made provision for the day smacks highly of carelessness on my part. Friends tell me it was utterly inexcusable and thus chastised, I have also not allowed myself to forget it.
A has been brilliant throughout about it all. He has not held a single grudge and took it very well on the day – treating the whole thing with humour and generosity. I hate to think I might have disappointed him and wonder what else, how else I might have done so.
But here’s the thing about monogamy or any other relationship – people have to rub along. We find ourselves to have a smoother path with less of the rough compared to our past relationships and are happy to continue as we are.