Liam spills the beans

The date with Liam began pleasantly enough.  He had arranged to meet Amy at Goodge Street tube station and they kissed their hellos, chaste kisses on the cheek.  Liam had been the one who was constantly travelling about the world, one of the perks of academic life once you’d reached a certain level obviously.  He told her that he was going to Barcelona the following week for a few days – something about meeting one of the post grad students under his supervision whose funding sources were based there.  Very nice for some.

On the other hand he rather takes on more duties than there is enough time in the day to fill and so his work life balance can be a little askew sometimes.  Still he is no dull Jack  of all work and was looking forward to their dinner date.  It was their first in the new year.

Amy found him quite easy to talk to and this despite their both foregoing alcohol with their meal. He was ever the gent and waved aside her offers to pay for the meal since he had footed the bill at their previous outing.  They went on to an Italian coffee bar after exiting the restaurant, making their way towards Warren Street.  It was the same barista as their last visit last year who greeted and showed them to a table next to a shelf of Italian books – translated works by American writers such as Sidney Sheldon and John Grisham.

What did they talk about  –

  • that Liam was still looking to fall in love but considered this unlikely to happen since he hadn’t found anything like the same feelings he had felt for someone nearly two decades previously.  When Amy described her feelings of emotional attachment, he said he would give anything to be able to feel that way about someone and thought what she considered a bit of a curse was a bonus since he was so out of practice.  She wondered if his inability to form attachments might have anything to do with the lack of frequency of dating and touching someone.  They agreed that it was through touch that the essential bonding chemical oxytocin was released.
  • how he had so many things besides dating on his to do list that he could only manage to date once every 4-5 weeks – which makes him appear a bit of a bastard since he doesn’t see the point of daily messaging or email contact in between arrangements to meet up.  Amy said that had he not explained this to her she might have thought so, but with the explanation she was quite likely to feel more sanguine towards him when he did make contact.  She told him about Goran who had kept messaging contact almost on a daily basis since their first online how-do-you-dos.
  • arranging to meet next month and promising each other that they would set aside a few days in March when they’re both away together in a foreign city
  • whether he would be able to continue dating someone he knew was dating other people at the same time after a while.  At the moment he knows that he could not expect Amy not to see other men since he was unavailable emotionally most of the time.
  • whether she would consider sleeping with him again – that he very much thought she’s hot but was conscious not to appear pushy.  This really surprised her as she had been under the impression from his past messages that he found having sex without the emotional connection distressing.
  • his relationship with his previous online date, a woman who was a therapist who had analysed their relationship and him to the point that he felt stifled and unable to behave naturally.

So their date ended this time with a lot more understanding of what made the other tick and what they might be looking for.  And again warm kisses were exchanged outside his tube station after she walked with him back to his neighbourhood.

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