new year, new men

Dear Sally

In an effort to get over my crush on Goran I  returned to the dating website and weeded through the dross to find two reasonably decent people to get to know.  Both live just outside the M25 but it’s the quality of conversation that counts.  With one we’ve already established how similar our life experiences are, he’s just one step behind me having recently ended a longterm relationship and beginning to discover the joys or being single again.  We seem to read similar material and are both seeing married people at an insufficient frequency.  He said I really like sex … a lot.  To which I replied Yay! ditto.  I think we’ll get along well.  All that remains to find out is how good we’ll be in bed together.

The other man resembles a certain politician leader of the opposition (I blame the beeb for suggesting that he might be a sex symbol, it must be a subversive ploy by the government!) – down to the little beard and lithe body although he wears glasses, and is a little older than me.  We text chat and it seems to be going at a reasonable pace.  I marvel at our patience, but maturity and experience temper the rhythm in this dating malarkey.  We exchanged phone numbers pretty early on and have not swapped risqué photos – thank goodness.  Gone are those days – seedy shots of body parts are so last year.  We seem to have less in common compared to the other guy but it makes for interesting exchanges too.

I have managed to put Jan and Goran on the back burner as both are otherwise preoccupied.  Goran continues to dance to the tune of Mrs G who seems to be seeing her bf quite a bit at the moment judging by the number of messages he sends me when he’s left on his own.  I know that to onlookers it makes me look like a prop, and whilst I sympathise to some degree, he has made his decision to live by her rules.  I sense myself detaching from him for now although I do still occasionally check my phone to see if he’s online.

Jan felt a certain amount of uncertainty about his relationship with his NW.  He said that they’d already had a few spats but made up – all to do with his revealing that he was still in touch with ex-gfs and his recurring dreams about his ex-wife.   I can sense that this NW of his might be the possessive jealous type – how will it all play out?  I’ve kept my distance and await his reports.

On NY’s eve there was quite a lot of banter going on with Ramon and he’s always complimentary about me, mainly because I tend to compare myself unfavourably to him – his ethical lifestyle seems to make me feel unworthy some of the time.  I enjoy his company but never seem to be able to be myself, as if I have to maintain a jolly, silly front.

Liam and Max make dates over the next couple of weeks and I’ve even arranged to meet up with Goran’s ex-girlfriend who offered to dogsit for me whilst I’m away for my epic trip down under.  Michael sent me a sweet message over the NY.  I’d given him a poem as a Christmas present which his gf at the time tried to throw away.  We remain distant co-parents as things can never return to what they were.

That’s my news so far

Amy x